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Title : Control freaks
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Control freaks

 There was a time when I thought my single life was over. I became romantically involved with someone who seemed very attentive, sort of exciting, and fun to be with. I almost used the word 'kind' there, in the description of our relationship. I changed my mind, he was not kind. But I was swept away with the idea that this person was going to be the one to spend the rest of my life with. 

I was not a spring chicken and by this time I thought I knew what relationships were all about. Equality and respect from both sides. I was mistaken. There was something not right about our relationship from the start, but I stuck with it, because I am an optimistic kind of person and thought things can only get better. It didn't, it got worse. 

The person I chose to spend the rest of my life with turned out to be a control freak. Once I realised I gave him the benefit of the doubt and did everything I could to make it work. The faithful girlfriend who was always going to be there for him, always support him, and always love him excluding all others. I made that promise. 

Two years into it was a turning point. He questioned my every move. I realised that they weren't just questions, but a full blow interrogation of what had I been doing on that day. He demanded to know who I had been talking to, and what had been said. We worked at the same company so we knew the same people. He even started spying on me, admitting that he had seen me talking to someone, then asking me if I was chatting him up. 

I still went along with it because I thought he might have confidence issues and a low self esteem. I thought if I reassured him that he was the only one for me, the interrogation might stop and he might start to relax. But no, it didn't it only got worse as his demands became more frequent. He needed to know he could control me. 

Something had to change, and I had to change it. I had to admit that this relationship was going nowhere. I told him I never wanted to see him again. It all comes back to the saying that you can't change how someone is behaving, but you can change how you deal with it. 

He pestered me for a while with phone calls and wouldn't let go. I was on the verge of reporting him to the police. Eventually they fizzled out. Thank goodness I managed to untangle myself from that mess and get out.  

A headline caught my attention this morning which brought this all back to me. 

Get out of our lives you authoritarian little control freaks.

Grow up. Stop treating us like children who need to be sheltered. Stop telling us all things need to be banned for our own good. Get out of our lives you authoritarian little control freaks.

Thanks for popping in. Catch ya later. Toodle pip.   ilona

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